Dmx Arrested for Impersonating Waiter at TGIF

Actor and hip hop recording artist DMX (Earl Simmons) arrested again today for disorderly conduct in a strange series of events leaving many fans, and even the police baffled. Local patrons of The TGIF in Westbury, Long Island were treated to an unusual lunch when being greeted by the famous rapper and asked to place their order. Eyewitness reports confirm he was intoxicated but decline to assail his ability as a waiter “He prayed with us, barked at us and sweated profusely, he was obviously high, but man what a great waiter. He knew the drink specials, the food was delicious and at no point did he write down anything, it was unsettling.” Workers at the establishment gave the known crack addict a wide berth, running food and seating his section frequently. Previously arrested for impersonating a Federal Agent at the JFK airport in 2008, Dmx was released early this year after serving 3 years related to the incident. Now he looks to be back in trouble with the law for resisting arrest, stealing employee uniforms and causing a public disturbance.

Before Police apprehended him, he was overheard asking a table of four            “Whatcha Really Want.”